From JewishBookCouncil.org
Earlier
this week, Emily Stone wrote about Jews and sports (have you taken her
quiz "Athlete or Mathlete?"). Her book, Did Jew Know: A Handy Primer on
the Customs, Culture, and Practice of the Chosen People (Chronicle
Books), is now available. She will be blogging here all week for Jewish
Book Council and MyJewishLearning.
While
some stars look Jewish or publicly identify as Jewish, supporting
Israel—you go, Scar Jo!— or record Chanukah songs that even gentiles
love to love, others mask their heritage like a traveling salesman with a
toupee; only, no matter how many times you comb it over, transplant it
or blow it out, everyone knows it’s a rug, especially in high-def.
Meantime, some stars kinda look ethnic (read Jewish) but aren’t. It’s a
conundrum.
In my house growing up, a stronghold of secular but
devoted cultural Judaism, as soon as anyone’s name was introduced,
famous or otherwise, my mother would immediately and inevitably
punctuate the mention with the modifier “JEWISH!” or “NOT JEWISH!” While
this particular brand of Yiddishkeit echolalia may not have been unique
to our household alone, it is unique to the Jews to think about who is
and isn’t Jewish, more than, say, the goyim. Walker Laird Gaffney and
Turfer Throop probably do not yell out the word "JEWISH!" mere seconds
after you tell them you just had lunch with Manny Howard or Jessi
Burger. Nor do they gleefully tell you that Kate Hudson is, in fact, a
member of the Tribe and exactly how and why (maternal grandmother).
What’s
interesting here, or perhaps troubling—more than the commonplace
self-identification practices of the Tribe via name recognition—is who
among those in Hollywood chooses to maintain a public Jewish identity
and who decides to go lo pro, even though, let’s face it, we all know
what’s up. And I’m not talking about who’s a Zionist—that’s a whole
other blog—or about depictions of Jewish characters in movies or in
TV—don’t get me started—but who is a big ol’ ethnic Jewy the Jew all the
livelong day in looks and name and life besides Madonna and Britney
Spears! O Red String and Yehuda Berg (JEWISH!), thank you for all you
have done. Hot gentiles dressed like bunnies at Purim parties? It’s a
world gone mad.
While there’s a certain pride in Jewish identity
in the world of letters, Hollywood generally shies away from wholly
embracing Jewish identity, with the exception of the yearly smattering
of Holocaust films or the Goldbergs and Krusty the Clown. This is
remarkable especially when you think about the fact that Tinsel Town
continues to be presided over by its forefathers, almost all of whom
still seem to prefer an anemic version of what I like to call “blow-out
Judaism,” where everyone either looks like Courtney Cox at a slut
cotillion or is a fax of a fax of a fax of pre-bad-for-the-Jews Woody
Allen.
In other words, whether or not you believe in your heart
of hearts that America is a Christian Nation, its goysiche look is
defined and imposed by a bunch of schleppy desert nomads whose last
names end in –stein, –berg, –sky and –witz. And these now wildly
successful American nomads, no matter how Jewish they themselves may
look, do not, I repeat do NOT want to look at frizzy hair, nor back TV
series about life in Borough Park. It’s everything a Jewish boy from
Brooklyn or the Bronx would live to avoid. Still and all, my mother and I
are not fooled! And when big, dark curly hair comes back with a
vengeance, which it will, believe Jew me, we are ready and have been
since the 1980s. Come back to the Dry Bar, Harvey Weinstein, Harvey
Weinstein.
So the next time you’re settling in for your next
Netflix marathon, and the credits are rolling, or Kevin Bacon (NOT
JEWISH!) enters the frame, play a rousing round or six of Jewish/Not
Jewish and let your neighbors keep score. It’s not just a game; it’s a
matter of national nachas.
It’s True-ish, They’re Jewish! A True/False Quiz
Continue reading.
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